Hell Hole rapid is a short intense ride that is one of most popular along the Trinity River while Sailor Bar is a favorite among locals.

by Molly Rupert

It's a simple warning: Never, under any circumstances, go white water rafting with a guide by the name of Flip or Crash.

Unless of course, you really want to get wet.

It's a standard joke among white water guides. They make a point of telling their customers--many of whom have never been in a rubber raft careening down raging rapids-- that their nicknames are NOT Rocky or Killer.

"You just don't want someone with that kind of name to be your guide," Trinity River Rafting Co. (TRR) guide Jeff Burgard said to a group of five openly anxious rookies recently. "I'm just plain Jeff, and this guide is Jessie."

A few chuckles ensued, lightening the mood before the reality of plunging down the Trinity River set in again.

Yes. There is an element of danger in the sport. After all, there is water, a lot of it thanks to an El Nino-plagued winter, traveling at rapid speeds over rocks, logs and other debris. "We are having early June-like flows," said Dana Steinhauser, who along with her husband David owns and operates TRR. "There is higher water, less rocks are peeking out but the water's not as pushy."

For all the teasing before the trip, safety is the most important and most stressed lesson of the day.

First comes the speech about putting on the bright red life jacket. It has to be tight, not just snug but you-can't breathe-or-your-lungs-will-burst tight.

"If you fall out, I will pull you up by the life vest, and we don't want you slipping out the bottom of it," said the guide, who doubles as an eighth-grade science teacher at Parsons Junior High School during the school year. "We want to make sure we get you back in the boat."

Next comes the lesson everyone hopes they won't have to put into action: "If you do fall out, put your feet up headed down river in the direction you want to go," Burgard said while perched in the proper position on the side of the still-beached raft.

Edna Bunts of Hercules put Burgard's instructions to the test when she fell out during the infamous Hell Hole rapid--a class III-plus--toward the end of the run.

"Wow, I don't ever want to do that again," said a shaky Bunts, a nurses assistant in San Francisco on a 10-year reunion trip with friends Nata DeVole of Hercules and Karen Hink of Kansas City, Mo. "Thank goodness those life vests really work."

The biggest fear associated with Hell Hole is the fact that rafters can't see beyond the horizon, so they don't know what to expect until they're going over the edge.

"We were up in the air and I kept thinking, 'Where does the oar go?' " said Jim Moninger of Kansas City, Mo., Hink's fiance. "All of a sudden you're there and heading straight into it and there's this big wall of water in front of you. There's nowhere to go but down."

"It was great," he said, covertly looking over to the Bunts.

Hell Hole is a short intense rapid that is one of the most popular along the Trinity. Sailor Bar, a longer rapid, without the drop factor, is also a favorite among locals. Rapids are classified from I to V, with V being the most difficult.

To be able to make it through the day relatively unscathed--except for the usual sunburn and sore muscles--requires a lot of teamwork.

Rowing together and listening to the commands of the guide is crucial to the success of the run.

"Everyone works," said Burgard, who kept his pupil's attention during the slower water with detailed information on the plants, birds and trees along the way. "You have to participate so you can feel the effects of the paddling" while in a rapid.

Getting the highly-inexperienced crew to work together is almost as much fun as going through rapids. Several spins and smacking oars is standard during the first few minutes of the trip.

"I kind of thought I would like it," said DeVole after the half-day trip. "I was more nervous I would make a fool out of myself than of getting hurt."

"Now I want to go on the all-day trip," she said.

As long as her next guide has a nice, safe name.